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    im back...

    i have been so caught up my own head that i have not updated this page...
    it seems that this page has exhausted its purpose to me which was to update my mummy on wat is going on over here... plus of course to chop this username coz i kinda like it.
    but nvrtheless...
    its kinda poetic that i mus rant on this day, of all days...
    a new chapter is about to begin and well, im kinda interested to see how it will turn out. nvr tot it wld turn out this way, but at least i have CAF, pretty and all the other animals. as long as i got CAF by my side i think i can pull through. coz in the end, this is ultimately a small thing in life's bigger picture.
    more shit things happen and shit things happen to others as well.
    nahh... stop ranting, no point.
     
    E - if i had known it wld come to this, i wld nvr have signed on ur dotted line all those yrs ago.
     
     

    =) Go WOMEN!!!

     

    bad pet owner

    yeah...
    that wld be me...
    we were trying to give find a new home for Herr Katze as we jus had too many animalsin the house, the CAF and i decided it wld be Herr Katze who has to go. ANyway... so yesterday when we reached home and i got out of the car i saw the pet carrier in the back of the car.
     
    CAF - oh, i wanted to take Schnudel out thats y its there...
    me - Sarcastic.. ok
     
    but when we finally got upstairs CAF dropped the bomb on me -
     
    Me - so where is Herr Katze
    CAF - "he's gone!!!!!"
    "WHAT?? - what you mean he is GONE!!!"
    Jus gone!!!
    Gone where??
    i got rid of him!
    WHEN??
    Monday
    MONDAY???? Yeah rite...
    Seriously - u didnt even notice which i predicted
    yeah.. rite - come on, where is he?? (searching the whole house)
    Darling, he is gone - put him at this shelter @ *** He will have food and friends there.
    I dun believe you
    Really!!
    Then y u nvr tell me!!!
    Coz i din want to upset you... i figured i jus get rid of him and u wun even notice for a few days, then when u finally realise that he gone a few days will pass and u wun feel so bad coz u realise that u havent even missed him a few days.
    Disappointed
    see!!! =) Red heart
     
    what a bad pet owner i am... but i really didnt like HerrKatze tat much... jus not my type... =$ but i didnt want him to leave like that... at least i wanted to find him a home where he will be loved and cared for.. he's such a wuzz cat that he will die on the streets!! =(
     
    i dun even have a photo of him.. =(
     
    But im such a bad pet owner... didnt even notice my pet was missing for 4 days!!!! =(
    FrauKatze, HundKatze.. will take v good care of you =(
     
    Red heart Herr Katze - this is for you in memory - your wife and your fren Red heart
     

    like putting a baby to sleep...

    last night i discovered that i am a baby and need to put to sleep so that the adults can play untill the wee hrs of the night...
     
    so upset
     
    so if wanna do this, at least be quiet so that i can sleep...  and dont trip the power so that the aircon powers off coz i wld be asleep and cldnt really switch it back on resulting in a real bad rest coupled with a hot and stuffy bedroom!!!
     
    Sad
     

    In memory...

    My condolences go out to the family of Dr Allen Ooi - although I do not know him, I feel a great sense of sorrow hearing of his story - I hope he and his family can find peace and know that he was for sure a good man.
     
     
    Red roseRed roseRed roseRed rose

    Welcome Schnudel =)

    and finally after days and days of trying... i finally got a two nice ones of the latest addition to my zoo =)
     
    Welcome Schnudel!!! =)
     
     

    marital bliss

    So yesterday, CAF and I had a v strange conversation....
     
    Me - DARLING..... u always steel all the blanket at night.. so i can never sleep!! SUPER irritating!!!
    CAF - no i dont...
    Me - Yes you DO!!!! Then i also have no space to sleep coz u always take all the space!!
    CAF - but you dun even use the blanket!! y u complain so much??!@?
    Me - Yes i doooo... its jus its quite hot at night coz u always come so close to me which is why im always hot and have no space!!!
    CAF - how can it be hot??? im always so cold at night!!
    Me - well why dun we swop sides of the bed then... i sleep directly underneath the aircon then... see how that feels
    CAF - but how can we swop sides?? the MAN always sleeps on the Left.. how can i give up my MAN spot!!!
    Me - urghhh.. come on.. there is no such thing as a MAN side... so how??
    CAF - ok la.. swop then.. for one night we try a swop. see if u like it la...
    Me - OK!!
    CAF - OK!!!
     
    after work today over dinner, CAF and i continued this VERY strange conversation.....
     
    Me - so how Darling, how was the other side of the bed last night?
    CAF - errr... no diff la, i still feel cold.. it doesnt matter which side i sleep on, its still cold, jus feels strange to be on the other side.
    Me - i had a great sleep =)
    CAF - ok, so how? u wanna change sides??
    Me - i dunno.... u say the man mus have his side.. then how!!! wah.. but quite strange, these kinda things also need to be 'discussed'....
    CAF - wateva .... u jus decide ok?? to me still cold.. and i will still come close to u...
    Me - ok, we'll see how =)
    CAF - ok then darling.. u jus let me know wat you wan... Sarcastic
     
    So this does beg the question.. is there a MAN and a WOMAN side?? watever it is.. i guess you learn something everyday =) Even little things like what side of the bed you sleep on you shld nvr take for granted... or shld you?? haha.. lame.. super lame... but see... the silly little things married life deals me... but i like =) as long as got CAF its oki =)
     
     

    i wanna try this -

     

     

    all in a day

    i did my first race in a long long time... V and me went for the Anchorvale Endurance Challenge @ Sengkang West. The race consisted of a 300m swim and 3.5km swim. So fun - it was a quiet, no frills and decently organised event. with only an entry fee of $10, it was $10 well spent =)
     
    So here's to the winners - one and two placings in the womns open category!! Congrats to us!!
     
     
    And one for the photoalbum... (L)
     
     

    omg omg omg

    omg omg omg...
    competition this weekend!!!!!
    kinda excited =)
     

    Pretty in Pink??? =S

    sorri to say this, but nothing beats the feeling of new shoes - especially new Lunars. The plush nice bouncy running on the moon kinda feeling (not that i have ever run on the moon... ) but yeah, ran in them yesterday before i went for my swim. veli nice!!! but then again.. lunars are nice... even tho it was a short run, was a nice one. ANyway, what do we have nice shoes for if we can only use them at certain occasions!!! wth.. haha.
     
    Swimming was kinda interesting yesterday.. first of all it was super crowded and i had to move out of the way A lot... wished that others cld occasionally move out of the way as well.. not always me... then also i wish that next time couples wldnt fondle each other under water.. coz actually ppl can see it, even they think no one can. But yeah.. covered 3.2km and later knocked out on the bed. my god, i cannot rem the last time i woke up and was sooooo desperate for another 10min of shut-eye this morning.. i did a 1.5km easy swim followed by 4 * 400m progressive swim. A joined me halfway =) cool. gave me that last bit of push to finish the sets coz i was REALLY getting a bit cheesed of with the crowded pool and the lovebirds.. so at the end, i did some sprints - 25m underwater followed by 25m sprint. in between one of my sprint sets this guy asked me whether i was a sprinter -
     
    Guy - You a sprinter?
    me - er... nooo.. haha, too slow for a sprinter
    Guy - dun look like it tme...
    me - well, wat im doing is not really sprinting la.. im jus doing a bit anaerobic exercise.
    GUy - oh.. ok ok, but looks like a sprint to me.. so what are you then? a long D swimmer?
    me - I do Triathlon.
    Guy - oh.. ok ok. yeah, they do Long D
    me - yeah.
    Guy - but then u still look like a sprinter
    me - er.. not really.. i have not been in the water a good yr+
    Guy - well... 
    lemme try your sprint sets and keep up with you =)
    me - =) oki
     
    and i think he did the 25m dive as well, but i wasnt really looking coz i was underwater.. but good for him =)
    Thurs will be swimming again. wonder whether my fren there will come - do alternate lap races with me =p im up for it!!! Duan-o - next time u bet $20 can?? then u can buy me MacD later - they're open now. actually this whole new swim regime is kinda fun. I guess i didnt realise how much i missed it. =)
     
    but yeah, haha.. back to my shoes... it has been the season for new things. nike Women new season kicked off in Feb, so i have gone out and got a lot of new things Embarrassed im really not a big fan of pink, but for this season it seems that i am making an exception... a BIG one...
    first of all these - the PINK lunars..
     

    Then these- Nike Sister 1 with new diamond Flex Technology. Real nice and comfy. U can really move in ANY direction you want easily. Actually the retail campaign and Benefit communication does not do the shoe justice coz the arrows in the windows only point to the 4 corners (up down left right).. but then shld point everywhere!! haha. But ya, used this in the gym during workout yesterday. NICE!!!

    and if that wasnt bad enough... add on this -

    Its nice la.. and comfy. But no worries, all is not lost, coz the bag is still black =p

    This is MARY - coz i dun like her real name Monika Bag...  the Yellow one is pretty nice too... mus see if i can get one of the yellow one.

    SIGH.... money in money out...

     

    monday blues?? not me =D

    yes, and that wld be becauseeeeeeeeeeeeeee.......................
     
    I have a friendly bus driver who greets all passengers at every stop in both chinese and english AND says "Thank you, See you again! =)" with a smile to every alighting passenger! How nice is that =) It sounds corny, but it really is a nice thing. Kids may laf at him for doing it, but he brightened up my MOnday and I will greet him next time i see him =) (coz i didnt this morning as i was too shocked to see someone who does that).
     
    But anyway.. as i often ponder bout my Monday journery's to work, today was one of the more cheerful ones. first of all the bus driver was so friendly on the way plus i got a seat on the bus =) Thirdly, the coffee uncle knew my drink and he even added more milk to my coffee without me having to ask for it - jus the way i like it =) another nice thing was i saw my cousin C today - she hasnt been in town for a while, but nice to see her every now and then =)
     
    So when u come home and see ur table cloth shredded to pieces on the floor with a happy dog next to it.. its really not that bad.. after all, its jus a stupid table cloth =) Lub you Pretty!!! =) Hey, it cld be worse like that time when i came home and saw you covered in shit and the floor and walls as well! =p
     
     
    but pls dun do it again Embarrassed

    life really does go by too fast

    when you see things like this, you know that life really does go by too fast....
    Invitations to events that will happen 9 months in the future?? jeez mizella... i cld have a baby by the time the event ticks by...
     
     

    moments from a long journey

    Thir morning, CAF kindly gave me a lift halfway across the island saving me a lonely standing trip on the train from Sengkang to Boon Lay.. So after he dropped me outside his office, i took a long bus ride to Boon Lay.. i jus had to snap this as this is the kind of bus my mum always used to wait for when we used to visit singapore every yr. she wld make my sis and i wait for the half-hourly orange 602 bus (if i remember correctly..) along Farrer rd or Holland Rd. thousands of no. 7, 77 wld jus zip by and we'd jus sit there and wait... in those days u still had the option of travelling on a non-aircon bus.
     
    see mother, change is inevitable... now even your fav bus has been converted =p
     
     
    But yeah.. so i finally arrived in Boon Lay after this bus took me into every possbile neighborhood between Mindef and Boon Lay... I was amazed when i saw this:
     
     
    and tahts only the half of it.
    looks like a school yard jus outside the bus interchange.
     
    but yeah.. has been an eventful day. tmw and sun i will be confined to the halls of the singapore expo.. trying to convince some poor soles to part with their money for the greater good of the my employer... but wat to doo.... we all have a job to do us here at work also need to empty our warehouse.  oh well... nothing like an hr or 2 of peace and quiet to calm the mind before i jump into two days of madness... hehe
     
    Pretty was really noti tthis evening...
    i slapped her pretty hard... so hard my hand hurt...
    someone's gotta do it...
    but i hope she stops being sooo noti, she is driving me up the walls...
    arghhh...!!!
     
     

    Wisdom - from Lee Wei Ling

    Im not one to be pro-Lee family, but i am pro-Powerfulandsuccessfulwomen Stories... so here is goes. Our HR Manager sent out this mailer this morning which really hit a chord with me... maybe its coz of my curent state of mind, or coz i was not blessed with the silver spoon... but the things she mentions are so so true and as an outsider or foreigner or whatever... i do find it hard to believe how intense all these little things can get on such a small island nation... maybe it is precisely this small size that makes it so intense...
     
    anyway, here it goes - this is what she sent. Bit long but worth a read.
     

     

    Subject: Wisdom
    from Lee Wei Ling, Kuan Yew's Daughter, By Lee Wei Ling

    In 2007, in an end-of-year message to the staff of the National Neuroscience Institute, I wrote: 'Whilst boom time in the public sector is never as booming as in the private sector, let us not forget that boom time is eventually followed by slump time. Slump time in the public sector is always less painful compared to the private sector. Slump time has arrived with a bang.

    While I worry about the poorer Singaporeans who will be hit hard, perhaps this recession has come at an opportune time for many of us. It will give us an incentive to reconsider our priorities in life.
    Decades of the good life have made us soft. The wealthy especially, but also the middle class in Singapore, have had it so good for so long, what they once considered luxuries, they now think of as necessities.

    A mobile phone, for instance, is now a statement about who you are, not just a piece of equipment for communication. Hence many people buy the latest model though their existing mobile phones are still in perfect working order.


    A Mercedes-Benz is no longer adequate as a status symbol. For millionaires who wish to show the world they have taste, a Ferrari or a Porsche is deemed more appropriate.

    The same attitude influences the choice of attire and accessories. I still find it hard to believe that there are people carrying handbags that cost more than thrice the monthly income of a bus driver, and many more times that of the foreign worker labouring in the hot sun, risking his life to construct luxury condominiums he will never have a chance to live in. The media encourages and amplifies this ostentatious consumption. Perhaps it is good to encourage people to spend more because this will prevent the recession from getting worse. I am not an economist, but wasn't that the root cause of the current crisis - Americans spending more than they could afford to?

    I am not a particularly spiritual person. I don't believe in the supernatural and I don't think I have a soul that will survive my death. But as I view the crass materialism around me, I am reminded of what my mother once told me: 'Suffering and deprivation is good for the soul.' My family is not poor, but we have been brought up to be frugal. My parents and I live in the same house that my paternal grandparents and their children moved into after World War II in 1945. It is a big house by today's standards, but it is simple - in fact, almost to the point of being shabby. Those who see it for the first time are astonished that Minister Mentor Lee Kuan Yew's home is so humble. But it is a comfortable house, a home we have got used to. Though it does look shabby compared to the new mansions on our street, we are not bothered by the comparison.

    Most of the world and much of Singaporewill lament the economic downturn. We have been told to tighten our belts. There will undoubtedly be suffering, which we must try our best to ameliorate.
    But I personally think the hard times will hold a timely lesson for many Singaporeans, especially those born after 1970 who have never lived through difficult times.

    No matter how poor you are in Singapore, the authorities and social groups do try to ensure you have shelter and food. Nobody starves in Singapore. Many of those who are currently living in mansions and enjoying a luxurious lifestyle will probably still be able to do so, even if they might have to downgrade from wines costing $20,000 a bottle to $10,000 a bottle. They would hardly notice the difference.
     
    Being wealthy is not a sin. It cannot be in a capitalist market economy. Enjoying the fruits of one's own labour is one's prerogative and I have no right to chastise those who choose to live luxuriously. But if one is blinded by materialism, there would be no end to wanting and hankering. After the Ferrari, what next? An Aston Martin? After the Hermes Birkin handbag, what can one upgrade to? Neither an Aston Martin nor an Hermes Birkin can make us truly happy or contented. They are like dust, a fog obscuring the true meaning of life, and can be blown away in the twinkling of an eye.

    When the end approaches and we look back on our lives, will we regret the latest mobile phone or luxury car that we did not acquire? Or would we prefer to die at peace with ourselves, knowing that we have lived lives filled with love, friendship and goodwill, that we have helped some of our fellow voyagers along the way and that we have tried our best to leave this world a slightly better place than how we found it? We know which is the correct choice - and it is within our power to make that choice.


    In this new year, burdened as it is with the problems of the year that has just ended, let us again try to choose wisely.  To a considerable degree, our happiness is within our own control, and we should not follow the herd blindly.


    *The writer is director of the National Neuroscience Institute. * "]

     

    latest online shopping obsession...

    my mother bought from this rk-fashion.com and asked me to help her make the payment which instantly sparked another online shopping craving!!! these are my latest things that caught my eye...
     
     
    And of course i wld nvr shop alone... hehe, so these are the ones my sis is eyeing....
     
     
    actually the yellow one is kinda cute and i wldnt mind the white one too...
     
    HMMMMMMMM
     
    Tongue out
    What you think mei?
    you want anymore?
    lemme know
     
     
     

    Gong Xi Fa Cai!!

    a bit late.. but better late than never.
     
    well.. this CNY has certainly been a different one. For one, i was on the giving end of the Ang Pow side. but I mus say... this surely made up for the fact that i didnt really bother with Xmas this yr... my fav season of the yr btw...
    Giving out the Ang Pow's to fam and frens sure did bring back the season of giving and happiness. Apparantly the more u give, the more u will get. but watever it is.. i jus pray this yr will be a better one. And also thanks to my employer for the Ang Pow that despite the economic downturn still remains the same =) I guess there is still hope in this world for good things =)
     
    So, for my dear mother who i know wished she cld be here to witness the another 'first' of a child's life... here is what my Ang Pow i gave out to the family looked like -
    they came in a box or shld i say.... a milk carton. Then, the individual ang pow's had a cow pattern with a little bell attached to it =)
     

    Courtsey of dear vendor D3 - www.d3.com.sg

    VBut yeah - mus say it was quite nice to be on the giving end of CNY. Feel like 10 yrs older... but better than not =)

    btw - that remainig packet above is for u mei - will mail it over =)

    long and touching story

    THis is a real long story, but i felt v touched by it and had to put it here..

     


    When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

    Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let
    her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.

    She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me
    softly, why?
    I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Dew. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

    With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which
    stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.

    She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who
    had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Dew so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

    The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing
    something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew.

    When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just
    did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

    In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't
    want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce.
    She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal
    a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

    This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked
    me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.

    She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her
    out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

    I told Dew about my wife's divorce conditions... She laughed
    loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

    My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce
    intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

    On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that
    I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time.. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

    On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her
    life to me.

    On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of
    intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

    She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a
    few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

    Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness
    in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

    Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry
    mum out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

    But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I
    held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

    I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without
    locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind... I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore.

    She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do
    you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.

    Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then
    slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

    At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers
    for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

    That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.


    The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank, blah..blah..blah. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. 

     


     

    happier times

    CL posted this onto FB - reminded me of happier times when cycling really was that fun... not that it isnt now - i have been back on the bike and liking every minute.
     
    btw - this is my new bike =p
     

    Motivation

    Lift - Shannon Noll
    I know you're hurting
    Feels like your learning
    'Bout life the hard way
    And it ain't working
    Seems like forever
    That you've been falling
    It's time to move on
    Your life is calling, yeah
    This is never meant to be the end
    Close the book and start again
    Chorus:
    Cos i know how hard it canget
    But you've gotta lift
    You've gotta lift
    And sometimes that's how it is
    But i know you're stronger
    Stronger than this
    You've gotta lift
    You've gotta lift
    When you feel your
    Whole body's aching
    What's left of your heart
    It wont stop breaking
    You've got to let go
    You took a hit
    Time to pick up now
    Move on from this
    This was never meant to be the end
    Close the book and start again
    Chorus
    You've got to lift yourself up above all
    the hurt
    Don't give in
    Wipe your tears and remember you're better
    than this
    Let them know that they took their best shot
    and they missed
    Come on and lift
    Chorus
    Pick up now...
    Pick up now...

    NoteNoteNoteNoteNoteNoteNoteNoteNoteNoteNoteNoteNoteNoteNote
     
    HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOTHER!